He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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