beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
