My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
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