All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Can you bring me the toilet please
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
