I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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