I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
