what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
