never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
