I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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