i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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