Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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