I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
