we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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