We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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