I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
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