I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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