Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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