that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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