Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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