I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
