awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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