Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
