ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
