I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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