i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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