How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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