There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
God gave him joint rollers for hands
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Randomize