My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
