and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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