Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
