I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
