Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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