Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
