just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Randomize
