I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Randomize
