PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
