I want you more than these girls want KFC
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize