btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize