On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
