Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
