I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
