My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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