we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize