He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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