Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
