ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
