girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
