i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
