SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
