Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
