So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize